I was wondering through the recent posts on Rockstar Finance yesterday, and I came across a video called The Broke Test. It’s a short video, so it won’t take too long to watch.
You know any former debt blogger worth their mettle, when faced with something as tempting a “Broke Test”, HAS to take it, if only just to prove to themselves that they’re not still broke. It’s not a question, it’s a given.
The comedian told the audience to clap if something has ever applied (conveniently serving as a cover for those currently in that situation), so I’m looking both at past and present here:
The How Broke is My Ass Test
Have you ever considered Kraft Dinner one of the four major food groups?:
Are you kidding me? Kraft dinner is way too expensive to be one of the four major food groups! Isn’t that stuff over a $1 a box now? When I was broke my go to was bread. Bread and a cup of tea. This is obviously before switching my diet to gluten free, as gluten free bread is a seriously expensive staple. The switch occurred about 8 months prior to paying off my debt, so I wasn’t 100% flat broke anymore, but I went through more rice, lentils, beans and potatoes during that time.
Have you ever had to roll change to pay for something?:
I’ve absolutely rolled change to pay for things, but I think the only reason why it was a need at the time was because I was impatient. I do however distinctly remember rolling my change, taking it down to the bank and putting it onto my line of credit at one point. It was another week before pay day and I needed the psychological boost of seeing the balance go down.
Have you ever put $2 worth of gas in your car?:
$2 no, $5 yes. It was when I had my Smart Car (which really wasn’t that much more fuel efficient than my current car), which was squarely in my broke timeframe. At the current gas price, $2 would get me 1.82L of gas, which at my current fuel economy would get me to work, but not home again. I would need to put about $3.25 in the tank to go to work and then come home again.
Have you ever had to drive around for an hour to find the Royal Bank Machine:
No, for two reasons: 1) if I’m only pulling $5 out then I should park the damn car because I’m going to use up at least that much in fuel, and 2) I don’t think Royal Bank machines actually dispense $5 bills anymore I remember them doing it when I was in high school, so I absolutely went to the corner store that had their machine, but I’m pretty sure the lowest the machines will dispense anymore is $20. Seriously, I wish bank machines still dispensed $5 bills.
Have you ever done Christmas shopping for friends or family at the dollar store?:
Baskets and wrapping paper, yes. Actual gifts, no. I find the quality of the decorative wrapping paper to be poor (kind of transparent) but if you’re looking for smaller quantities of cellophane or brown paper wrapping that you can decorate yourself, their prices can’t be beat. If you’re looking for larger quantities it might be worth checking out a store that sells bulk quantities. I remember buying packages of wrapping paper and ribbon at Costco years ago for under $20 each. The wrapping paper lasted me 8 years, and I’m still using the ribbon. If you live near an IKEA their wrapping paper quality is top notch, and isn’t actually that much more expensive than the dollar store.
That reminds me, I should go stock up on baskets soon. They always sell out early on me.
If your Visa card were to be stolen right now, would you be worried about it?
Right now? Oh hell yes I’d be worried! Three years ago they could have just taken it and run if they wanted to! lol.
Have you take the broke test? Where do you sit?
Recommended Reading: What is a Trailing Stop?