As I noted in my last post, the last week and a bit has been rather stressful at work, with the threat of pending lay offs looming over us. We didn’t know with any degree of certainty who would be remaining with the company, who would be gone, or when it would actually take place. I had my suspicions that we would start finding out yesterday. I was right.
As some of you already know, my job requires frequent shift work. Yesterday I worked a 10 hour day that started at 5am. By 6am, it had started. One by one, people were pulled out of their work areas and walked to the door. Again, and again, and again. The area I was working in was on a main hallway that feeds into other areas. I saw a lot of people.
At 9:40, one of the people who looks over my work walked up to me. There was a meeting schedule for our department at 10am. I left instructions about what I needed with regards to what I was working on, and then the guys I was working at wished me luck as I walked towards the front office. 10am came and went, with no news. I ran into my manager briefly in the coffee room, and he told me not to worry. I sat at my desk, which is near one of the (not soundproofed) meeting rooms, listening to people in other departments crying and hugging each other. At 10:30, I heard my manager said “follow me”, as a bunch of my coworkers walked towards another meeting room. I got up and followed them. He was carrying the same nondescript green folder that I had seen people carrying all morning. Maybe telling me not to worry was his way of saying he’d give me a good reference?
My colleagues filed into the meeting room in front of me. When I got to the door my manager said “No, not you.” and sent me back the way I had come. I went back down to my desk and realized not everyone in the department had actually been called to the meeting. I found out there had been a bit of concern when they saw me leaving, because the people who were aware of who were being laid off knew I wasn’t supposed to be on the list. I asked if I could go back to what I had been doing before, and I was told no, and to wait in the office.
About half an hour later everyone was back down at their desks, packing up. I had to fight back tears as I tried to comfort one of the girls who had been let go. That was hard. I wished everyone well as they packed up their desks, and had one of the guys briefly fill me in on what he had been working on, as I would be taking over his work for the rest of the day. Then I was allowed to go back to what I was doing.
At this point it had been almost 2 hours since I left my work area. The guys I was working with thought I had been let go. I didn’t even get back through the door before people started shaking my hand and congratulating me for making the cut. It was a horrendous feeling. Disturbed relief.
I went through the motions for the rest of the day, doing my job, but I just wanted out of there. I was happy that they kept the people that they did, but at the same time I saw people leave that I didn’t want to see let go. I’m not sitting here thinking “why me?”, but at the same time I know how easy it is to fall on the other side of the line. It’s my own rendition of survivor’s guilt.
My manager apologized profusely at the end of the day for the confusion when I was walking towards the meeting room with my former colleagues. Apparently when he said “follow me”, he had already mentioned each one of them by name. I had been doing my own thing, not really paying attention at the time, so I just followed the group when I saw them leaving. My manager said he felt sick when he saw me heading towards the meeting room door, because I wasn’t supposed to be there. Good to know.
I don’t think I could have timed my upcoming vacation better if I tried.
Recommended Reading: This Bank is Cray Cray
Wow that’s crazy! I can’t imagine how that would be to see everyone leave and think that you’re one of the ones getting laid off as well. Glad you made the cut!
Thanks Michelle, I’m glad too.
Congrats, you deserve to be there :0) It’s kind of like a promotions because with less people in the company your seniority should automagically increase and you’ll be more experienced than any new hires in the future. And it’s a great opportunity to step up and take on more responsibility but only if that’s what you want because 10 hour shifts sound like quite a tough job already
Thanks Liquid. Strangely enough I was already pretty high on the seniority list, everyone who left arrived well after I did. I actually don’t find 10 hour days to be tough, especially not when I’m only working for 4 days
You do make a good point about stepping up to the plate though.
Congrats on staying. Its definitely tough to go through that, watching people you work with and have gotten to know leave. We’re going through a restructuring right now and people have been surplused and left, but it was done a lot more quietly. Most we didn’t even know were gone until the next day. Not sure which one is worse. I’m happy not to be on that list, but it does still suck knowing other people don’t have jobs right now. Try and have a good weekend.
Thanks Morgaine. I don’t know if I would prefer having it done vocally or quietly. This one was vocal, but the last one was more quiet. Both are hard, but at least vocally you can say goodbye to people on their way out.
That sounds just as bad as this one time I was with a company and everyone was fired a week before Christmas.
OMG, are you serious? That’s terrible!
I’m very happy you weren’t “cut”. It’s too bad the company was so public about the process though :S and yes, you couldn’t have timed this vacation better if you tried…
Not bad for planning almost 9 months in advance!
That sounded like a stressful experience with the mistake (it was just reading about it)…. that’s great to hear your job is stable. Enjoy your vacay!
Thanks
Strangely enough I was pretty calm walking up to the meeting room.
Oh my gosh, Cassie, so glad your job is safe, but so sorry for what you had to go through watching it all and wondering if you were on the “go” list. You’ll enjoy that much-deserved vacation all the more.
Very much so. At least they told us that our jobs were secure at the moment, and they aren’t planning another round of layoffs
God that must have been so hard to watch. Congratulations on keeping yours though
Thanks
Wow. That sounds so…public? I’m glad that you get to stay, and I’m glad that it wasn’t too drawn out of a process. (At least it doesn’t seem like it with how quickly you posted this.)
It actually had to be public. The hourly personnel have it written into their contracts that they require a weeks notice before any layoffs occur, so it was announced to the entire company.
That sounds horribly stressful; I’m glad you made it through the day!
It was, and thank you.
*hugs*
I still remember the first time I found out someone I worked with was let go. It was the weirdest feeling, knowing that someone didn’t make it, but I did. Luckily, I haven’t been part of a massive lay-off, since I’ve started working. Only one or two at a time.
I hope you feel better soon.
*hug*
I hope you never have to go through the experience, it’s not a fun one.
Thank you
Oh wow. That sounds bad. I’m glad you’re safe though.
Thanks Asian Pear
Phew! I was tense all the way through reading that. Enjoy your much needed holiday, and so glad you made it through.
Thanks. I think at this point it’s safe to say I need it!
This reads like a short suspense thriller. Although it’s great that you made it, that’s an awful experience to have to go through!
It kind of felt like a suspense thriller to be honest :s
Holy crow, that sounds like an intense day. I’m happy you’re ok (and that it’s almost time for vacay!).
I’m so ready for my vacation it isn’t even funny.
oh thats so stressful! glad that you kept your job, but what an awful day for everyone.
WOW. I’m so glad you made it past the lay-offs, but that’s so sad for your colleagues (and you, to have to see them go!)
Wow, I read this on my lunch break and it was so suspenseful. I can’t imagine having actually been there. So glad you survived!
I think that was the weirdest part about going from internships to full-time employment, watching people leave who arrived before/after me instead of me being the one leaving. It’s even weirder when people are fired and I don’t think my brain fully comprehends that some day, it could happen to me too.